Fading

Written on 1-12-12

Tears cried

Blood shed

Hair fallen

Time wasted

Soul gone

The pain that was caused

Had such an effect

No one cared though

No one cared that she had cried

Or cut

Or was losing hair

Or wasting away

Or lost

She started to realize

That no one was the reason

For her pain

She was alone

No friends to make her laugh

No love to beat her heart

No good to rid the bad

No light in her darkest hour

But she figured

That that's how it's

Supposed to be

She thought she was meant

To be used

Their happiness came

From her pain

She was apathetic towards this

As she grew sadder and lonesome

The people that used to care

Left and became happy

She thought she caused it

Their pain

And she thought that them leaving

Was so they were happy

She thought it was just

But even so she question

If they were unhappy

Why would they have just left

She pondered endlessly

Becoming more depressed

She couldn't cry

Or speak

Or even have energy to awaken

This went unnoticed

By everyone that had cared

But now, it didn't matter

Her reality had morphed

From okay to hopeless

She thought she had no point

If she hurt others

Then she should hurt herself

Others had no problem hurting her

She just needed to do what they did

Lie, manipulate, curse, and hate

She started doing just that

She was cutting and burning

She wouldn't eat

She would call herself terrible things

All just to understand

But after awhile she didn't

She didn't understand anything

Not life, and not herself

In all of the pain

She had lost herself

She had lost her friends

And had lost her emotions

And thoughts

Upon realizing this

She was to lost to see

Or care about it

She didn't care if she was hurt

Only if others were

And she would blame their pain

On herself

And hurt herself even more

When she would be seen

No one recognized her

She was gone

Her soul was hollow

Her skin became pale

Her eyes dull

And for the most part

She had become mute

She was gone

No one cared

But she was gone

Even through her departure

They still talked

And hurt

And cursed

No one saw what they caused

But no one cared

They thought it was better

She thought it was better

She had never stopped changing

Until one day she couldn't

She had saw herself as dead for too long

That her thoughts took a hold of her heart

And stopped it

Stopped the beating

Stopped the blood

Stopped her life.